Heather on being 30

It has been a second since I was here blabbering about stuff. Oddly enough, having three kids tends to keep you somewhat busy. There is never a shortage of things I want to record here but finding the time is almost impossible it seems.

So, I turn 30 tomorrow. It is sort of weird. I remember thinking 30 was really something that would take a long time to happen to me, then suddenly, here it is. It just appeared out of nowhere. Time was apparently moving at warp speed when I thought we were just putzing along, Sunday driver style.

I have been thinking about being 30 a lot, and kind of wondering if it scares me as much as I think it should. I guess it doesn't... really. The only thing it has done effectively is to give me some regrets. I regret that I just realized the kind of person I want to be and started making a concentrated effort to be that person. I regret that I spent 29 years (give or take), having no direction. Floundering around in the world, looking for my voice, my purpose, myself. Oddly, when I finally realized who I wanted to be, it had very little to do with ME! I want to be a better wife, a better mama, and a better believer. Most of the things I want to be "when I grow up" are concentrated on service to others.

So, I guess the biggest regret is that for 29 years, I have been a little egocentric if you will. I spent the greater part of that time worrying about MY best interest, my wants, desires, and happiness. Once I realized that the focus shouldn't be me, it was amazing how quickly my interests, wants, desires and happiness were fulfilled by my service to others.

Two BIG things have happened this week, and I guess maybe the timing is coincidental, but it is probably more like a God thing if I am being honest. First of all, I developed a spot on my face. Here I was, thinking that all I was getting for my 30th birthday was skin cancer and a scar smack dab in the middle of my face to prove it. Here I was thinking "I am not ready to be sick. My kids, my kids, my kids." I finally convinced myself to go see a dermatologist, and guess what, it wasn't skin cancer. So for my birthday, I didn't get a scar, I got perspective. I got a wake up call. That is pretty great gift. Thanks God.

Secondly, I have spent a lot of time recently and in the past trying to figure out how to impact the world. Last week I realized that my heart is ministering to those who are affected by abortion, pre and post, and girls who think that the things that they have done define them and that there is no turning back from where they are today. While I have never had an abortion, I have many friends that I have seen go down that road. I have also been in a place where I felt that my decisions defined me and that there was no going back. So, I am moving forward, starting a ministry to those girls who are lost and those women who are hurting.

I ask that you would please pray for me as I start this journey and if you are interested in helping in other ways, let me know. I don't know what those ways are yet, but I bet God will make it clear to me in time.

That is all.

Birthdays, sports, and other stuff

In an effort to make me feel like I am aging far too quickly, my children continue to have birthdays. This week we had Reghanne's 10th birthday. I have been a parent for a DECADE!!!! It seems like not that long ago, I couldn't even fathom a decade, now I have been responsible for another person for one. Craziness! We celebrated in Hawaii with a trip to a nice (well in theory, it was probably nice in 1950 when it was built) restaurant and the Smith Luau (best on the island). Since we are suckers, we also threw her a little family party at Cici's on Sunday and then took her to breakfast and lunch yesterday, because she wanted too and the general rule is, if it is your birthday you get whatever you want (within reason). Cici's was fun despite the fact that she ended up dumping an entire bowl of spaghetti on top of Denton (no exaggeration, he was covered, somehow his head is the only thing that escaped mostly unscathed) She got a pretty new outfit from us for her birthday so she could go to dinner at Wolfgang Puck's restaurant with her Dad last night. She has wanted to go there since she could ask for ridiculous things and he decided hittin' double digits was a big enough occasion! She had the best time and came back apologizing because apparently Wolfgang Puck cooks better than me, go figure. The monster ordered a $63, 14 oz steak! (Really glad her Dad took her on this little adventure!!) and a $15 sliver of cake. She loved every minute of it though and I am sure it all made it worth while, until they got outside and realized her Dad had a flat tire and he had to change it in his dress clothes in the dark.... ho hum!

Denton's birthday is quickly approaching. Somehow he has managed to turn two in the blink of an eye. He is saying all kinds of things these days but the sentences come out all jerky like a robot. He also thinks that if he grabs my hand and says "come on" I am obligated to go where ever he wants me to go. Which is usually to the kitchen or to bed (he has a very limited number of interests these days). No clue what the party situation will be for him yet, but after our last few restaurant trips where he has run around like a wild animal, it needs to be somewhere he can do more of that....

Fall is here (well almost, I will be happy when the weather catches on to that fact) and that means lots of boring sports that I hate. The other night my television looked like a slot machine of dull... Nascar, football, baseball (which I like), nascar, football, baseball, nascar, football, baseball... I ended up the winner because it landed on baseball for good... really glad I have convinced myself to like at least one of these sports. I loathe nascar and football equally. Both are mind numbing to me and I do not get the appeal of either.

I thought I had other stuff but really, I have my son and my niece hanging with me while Kara and Reghanne do a complete re-organization of her room and they are being a little monstery right now.

That is all.